I had two very good ales in the Spoon's last night. Bitter & Twisted (3.8%) and Ale Lang Syne (4.5%). The second one was brought in especially for Burns' Night, and unfortunately I drank much too much of it.
I had a lot of trouble getting back in the car, and I was driving home at tremendous speed when I hit a lamppost or tree or something. Wrecked the car. When I got out I was relieved to see that I had taken someone else's car by mistake!
My whole family thought it a great joke!