Praise Mediocrity! $100 Billion Ab InBev, SABMiller Merger Approved By Shareholders

Have a question or want to show off your project? Post it! No Registration Necessary.  Now with pictures!

Mimicking my thought process at a Chinese buffet, Anheuser-Busch InBev
is making a massive push towards “quantity over quality” with a $100
billion acquisition of SABMiller.  This will give the massive company
control of 27% of global watered-down beer production, which is a
level of mediocrity heretofore unseen in the beer world.

In order to appease international regulators and avoid monopolizing
the "shitty beer" industry, the company had to sell off some of its
brands before the sale would be approved by its shareholders.  It
reads like the domestic and international beer list at your local
Applebee’s: Molson Coors will take over AB’s 58% interest in
MillerCoors, LLC (giving the company 100% control), and Asahi Group
will take over global rights to Peroni and Grolsch.  AB InBev will
also sell off what would probably be its finest macro-pilsner, Pilsner

What does this mean for the future of beer in our beloved country?
Probably not much.  This massive new venture will continue to churn
out sub-par beer, but will focus on expanding in other underserved
countries, especially targeting a growing market in Africa.  Other
than buying up craft breweries here and there instead of trying to
make good beer themselves—things will probably remain relatively

Additionally, chances are if you’re reading a site like this, you’re
probably not drinking a whole lot of Bud Light anyway.  So keep doing
the lord’s work and drinking local craft beer.  Fight the good fight,
and maybe once the rest of the world catches on, this brewing behemoth
will collapse under the weight of its own bloated beer belly.  Unless
Africa really likes Lime-A-Ritas.  That’s when we should start to

Site Timeline