Obviously this is a troll (I could be wrong, but I can't imagine there's anyone who finds ordering house wines embarrasing), from someone who thinks that "wine snobs" stand around looking down their noses at people who don't drink certain wines. In truth I think 99% of us here couldn't care less what our friends drink.
But the subject itself is interesting. Emery is right, a good restaurant generally has good house wines. And Tom is right, in a better restaurant there SHOULD be someone with wine knowledge to help guide one. But we all know that even in expensive restaurant these things are not always true. So is there a strategy for improving the odds?
To me the crucial thing here is personal tastes. Someone who knows little about wine is certainly not going to be familiar with the myriad possibilities of a wine list, and certainly is not going to try and remember suggestions for wine/food matching.
So it seems to me the thing to do is decide what kind of wine you like. Does your tastes in reds go to fruit-forward almost sweet wines (Yellowtail Shiraz), brawny tannic wines (harder to find in lower priced wines, but some Cabernets or Petite Sirahs), or lighter somewhat acidic wines (Chianti or Bourgogne). [note, I realize these are simplifications, there are soft round Chiantis, but bear with me]. In white do you prefer an RH Phillips/Kendall-Jackson style chardonnay, or a crisper NZ Sauvignon Blanc. Then if think of whites with the lighter dishes, red with the heavier, you have shot. It's doubtful that at an establishment like we're discussing you get real wine advice, but hopefully if you say "I'd like a red, something fruit and soft" someone at the restaurant will at least be able to steer you towards that endof their list.
Is this perfect? Not at all: You could end up with disastrous (IMO) matches (for instance, a hearty dish that has asparagus). But a disaster to me is probably not a disaster to someone who doesn't care about wine a lot anyway. And it at least gives you a chance. The fruity wine they have might be just awful. The waiter could not have a clue.
But this strategy IMHO at least gives someone who knows and cares little about wine a starting point. In any case, if you don't know much about wine, it's always wiser to stay on the lower-priced end of the list. Spending $$$ is no guarantee of quality.
Dale
Dale Williams Drop "damnspam" to reply