Darren,
I would have probably missed your joke unless you made it obvious (smiley face, LOL, ROTFLMAO, etc.). Anyway, the truth is that almost all root wines have an "earthy" nuance to them when young. Carrots are perhaps the least earthy, but it is still there. Parsnip, turnip, celery root, beet, dandelion root, rutabagas all have this taste when young. Onion and potato wines do not; I don't know why.
Here's an experiment you (or anyone serious about winemaking) can do. Make a gallon of beet wine. It will take about 8 months from start to bottling if you make it the way I do (see
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When finished, date the bottles and set them aside. Sixteen months later, start another gallon batch and make it the exact same way. In about 8 months, when you bottle it, pour the residual left in the secondary after bottling into one glass and open a bottle of the previous batch (now 24 months in the bottle) and pour a second glass. Now taste each and compare. Then you will know the truth about aging beet wines. BTW, if you wait another 16 months and make a third batch and then taste a glass from all three batches, you will be amazed a the smoothness of the first batch (now 4 years old).
I did this for many years with apple wine, making a batch every autumn and only when the new batch was in the bottle did I open the previous year's apple wine (a practice my grandfather taught me). It was always orders of magnitude better than the new wine, but after its third year in the bottle it declined rapidly. You can extend this another year with tannin, but it changes the wine quite a bit -- it's okay, though, if you spice the wine before bottling (cinnamon, cloves and allspice).
Jack Keller, The Winemaking Home Page
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