Dogfish Head Announces new Raison C'est Fini

April 01, 2004 - Dogfish Head Announces 100% ABV, Continually-Hopped Beer
Declaring his brewery the final winner in the ongoing competition with
Boston Beer Company (Samuel Adams) to brew the world's strongest beer,
Dogfish Head founder, CEO and former Hagar Slacks model Sam Calagione
announced today the release of Raison C'est Fini, a 100% abv brew which is
also "hopped continuously with a blend of every hop variety grown on every
continent in the world during the year 2003, plus some stuff that looks an
awful lot like hops which I found out behind our Milton brewery."
Boston Beer's Jim Koch was not available for comment. Some reports have him
retiring in disgrace to Costa Rica.
Calagione noted that Dogfish Head's high end, high octane beers "have always
been designed to draw wine and cognac drinkers into the craft beer market,
but we realized recently that we were focusing on only one segment of the
wine market. With the flavor and character of grain alcohol, Raison C'est
Fini will attract those consumers at the other end of the spectrum who favor
brands such as Thunderbird.. Not that we're ignoring our established base,
of course. With all that alcohol and all those hops, I think we can safely
say this beer will be very highly rated by the online beer groups, even by
those members who never get to taste it."
In order to constantly hop the beer, Dogfish Head engineers took a set of
Barbie and Ken dolls and paired them in a manner which Calagione described
as "very, very friendly but not `family' friendly, if you know what I mean,"
to create a unique hopping mechanism. "This is so far beyond Randall the
Enamel Animal that I get giddy just thinking about it," he admitted.
The invention, Barbie & Ken Hop Climax, is proprietary and being held in
strict security at the brewery. Thus, in order to insure that Raison C'est
Fini is being hopped right up until the last pint is drawn, brewer Bryan
Selders will be packaged with each keg as it is released. His job is to
force hop pellets into the top of the keg as rapidly as he can until it is
tapped, then throw fresh hop flowers into each glass as it is poured. Each
keg will be priced at $250.00 plus room and board for Selders.
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Alexander D. Mitchell IV
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